Let me tell you a story today. A story about a woman and her vibrator.
Five or six years ago I had a purple ‘Rabbit’ vibrator, among many other purple vibrators that I owned, that was my best friend.
This vibrator was always at hand when I needed it and soon I found myself reaching for my vibrator every single night to have a quick climax, which left me feeling filled with shame.
Part of that was sexual shame around touching myself, but part of it was shame from leaving my body in such a disconnected, unfulfilled state instead of trying to go deeper with myself sexually and tap into deeper, more expansive pleasure and orgasmic states.
I’m not saying clitoral stimulation, pleasure or orgasm is bad. I’m also not saying that using your vibrator is bad.
I like to focus more on INTENTION and how we FEEL before, during and after an orgasmic experience, whether any kind of climax happens or not. Regardless of what sexual tools we use…or not.
My intention is no longer about focusing more on quick-fix, fast food style sex or self pleasure.
I don’t feel like I’ve tapped into my full sexual and orgasmic potential after using a vibrator. Is this faster style of self pleasure great every once in a while? Yeah, but not as my go-to sexual experience anymore.
I want and have continued to want and allow deeper pleasure, sexual energy and orgasm. More quality orgasms vs quantity.
So I ditched my vibrator around four years ago and haven’t looked back since.
I get a lot of women who write to me and feel a lot of shame around being “addicted” to their vibrator.
There’s nothing wrong with using a vibrator and while it’s not really a tool I use much anymore (I can’t even remember the last time I used one!), I also remember how I used to feel about myself and my sexuality, pleasure and orgasm after using my vibrator.
I was always longing for more. I wanted to be more intimate with myself, sensually awakened and erotically charged by spending more time and going deeper with myself, but I kept using my vibrator as a way of avoiding it.
A lot of women use their vibrator and quick, peak-style clitoral climaxes as a way of avoiding going deeper with themselves. It becomes an addiction and soon you find yourself polishing off a 5-minute self pleasure session with an orgasm every night just to fall asleep.
Or deal with stress. Or relieve some sexual tension. Or “get sex over with” so you can get back to living in your head, avoiding what really stirs within you sexually. You know…that sexual, erotic, sensual creature that wants to come out and FEEL it all.
I want to invite you to see what sex and self pleasure are like without a vibrator. What pleasure and sexual energy is available for you to play with, extend, expand and deepen.
I made a new video for you on how you can ditch your vibrator (whether for good or temporarily – it’s ALWAYS up to you) and what you can do and use instead to experience better, deeper and more fulfilling pleasure, sexual energy and orgasm.
You can watch that video below.
As always, I honor you and your own erotic, sensual and orgasmic needs. What brings you pleasure and makes you feel more whole, alive and turned on is fabulous!
I love to provide you with options to feel even MORE pleasure, sensation, sexual energy and for your sexual and orgasmic potential to fully awaken and blossom.
Again, remember that your sexuality and pleasure are YOURS. You get to choose what tools, practices and experiences you allow sexually, whether a vibrator, jade egg, or pleasure wand are in the mix or not.
Whether you have more peak-style clitoral orgasms or not. Whether you have vaginal (or other orgasmic experiences) or not.
It’s all good and right as long as you feel good within yourself before, during and after.
If something feels good emotionally, spiritually and physically, follow that, but if you’re craving deeper, more expansive and extended orgasmic states, then just know that you have that potential within you now and all you have to do is awaken, unlock and allow it to unfold!
If you want to check out the sexual healing and self pleasure tools I mentioned, you can view the jade egg from my shop here. You can check out Chakrubs as well.
You can also get started by downloading a copy of my free 7 Jade Egg Secrets for more pleasure and deeper orgasms ebook if you’re curious about using the Taoist Jade Egg Practice as part of this path and journey to true sexual healing and ecstasy.
I also have a free video series coming soon on the jade egg so if you want to get the invitation, download my jade egg ebook to get exclusive access to my 3 Jade Egg Secrets video series!
You can also download my breathwork practice which will train you to hold more sexual energy and pleasure in your body, preparing you for longer, deeper and more expansive orgasmic states
I would love for you to share this video with any woman (or your lover!) in your life to spread the orgasmic love! You can subscribe to my YouTube channel here to stay updated with my weekly video.
Now an invitation for you to go deeper:
- Are you currently using a vibrator during sex and/or self pleasure?
- What is your experience like right now using one? How do you feel afterwards?
- How do you want to feel after self pleasure or sex?
- What kind of orgasmic experiences do you really crave to have underneath the quick-fix, shallow style of convenient pleasure you might be experiencing right now?
- What comes up for you when you think about doing a vibrator detox for a period of time?
With love,
Amber
P.S. If you want to follow my erotic adventures on Instagram and learn more about expanding your orgasmic potential, follow me on Instagram here!
You can also connect with other women who are remembering their deeply erotic, sensual and orgasmic nature here in my private Facebook group for women. We have over 1700+ women and I’d be honored to have you come and play with us!